Welcome to the world of one man's insanity and his accurate observations, also known as cynicism, of a world full of imbeciles and annoying people.

09 November, 2009


There a lot of misconceptions as to what a "chav" actually is, amongst both Americans and any British above the age of 35.

Wikipedia states that a chav is the following:
"The term Chav (pronounced /ˈtʃæv/ (CHAV)) and other regional variations (see "Regional variations" below) is a derogatory term applied to certain young people in the United Kingdom. The stereotypical chav is an aggressive teenager or young adult who often engages in anti-social behaviour, such as street drinking, drug abuse and rowdy behaviour. They are often assumed to be unemployed or in a low paid job, although it is incorrect to assume that all chavs are working class, as chavs belong to no distinct social class. Stereotypical "chavs" typically wear tracksuits and hoodies made by sporting brands such as Nike and Adidas and listen to mainly MC and some have been known to listen to Rap, R'n'B, Hip Hop and Techno.

Response to the term has ranged from amusement to criticism that it is a new manifestation of classism. One BBC TV documentary suggested that "chav" culture is an evolution of previous working-class youth subcultures associated with particular commercial clothing styles, such as mods, skinheads and casuals. The term has been associated with juvenile delinquency, the ASBO Generation and yob culture."

Although very accurate, it still misses a few vital points, not to mention the fact that "MC" isn't even a genre of music. Of course, Rap, Hip-Hop, and Techno aren't actually music either, although considered to be genres of popular music.
First off, chavs less human than they are ape. Finding a chav with an IQ higher than 100 would be a major discovery, and thus they make up for that fact by generally being quite strong, although they frequently believe themselves to be much stronger than they actually are.
Secondly, chavs are more commonly associated with "Burberry", although it would be more accurate to say fake "Burberry". They also tend to like "bling" and could be more commonly associated with the American "Gangsta" culture than previous "youth cultures".
Thirdly, the term "chav" doesn't have anything to do with class. You can get chavs from upper class backgrounds to working class backgrounds. The most likely reason for this misconception is that the majority of chavs are from the lower class backgrounds.
Fourthly, most of the crime amongst youth in Britain is comitted by chavs, thus giving a reason for their association with Juvenile Delinquency. It's because they are mostly juvenile delinquents that they get that association.

It would be a safe gamble to say that if every chav was gathered up for a "genocide", then the crime rate in the UK would drop drastically, not to mention that the average IQ would probably rise by at least 5 points.

Lord J

03 November, 2009

Football (NOT American Football)

Since I can hear loud cheering from the pub next to the computer room I'm currently in, I feel this is a good time to note my feelings of football.

I recently read "Unseen Academicals", by Terry Pratchett, in which the Unseen University make their own football team when control of the game "foot-the-ball", an incredibly violent game that's played in the less seen areas of Ankh-Morpork, is handed over to them. It's a good book, which is probably better if you understand more about football. It also provided an answer as to why people go mad over football. In the book, it's very simply called "The Shove". People go mad about it because it's something a football crowd does. It's what singing hymns is to christianity. It's part of the "religion" of football.

As for my personal feelings of the game of football, it is an increibly boring sport to watch unless you embrace the spirit of "the Shove". Playing the game's only marginally less boring than watching. I have difficulty getting into the spirit of anything, let alone a sport I've never liked, so whenever football gets large amount of coverage on TV it irritates me that there's no end to the amount of things they could put on instead that would be better.

Lord J